Alright. Given that I'm seeing a friend being unjustly abused by those over-eager to use broad brushes inappropriately and more interested in the abuse of stereotypes than in exploring the diversity of individual experience and celebrating the differences therein, I'll join this little party at the end of a long and cranky-making work-week.
First off, my "chops". I'm a gay man. I've been one for a good long while now - and no, I am not older than dirt, despite allegations to the contrary. Second, I've been around the block a time or three - I've co-chaired a Pride Parade, chaired security/safety for one, helped found a Pink Pistols chapter, served on a couple of community boards, and helped lead a protest or two.
I've been (and am) a plaintiff in a civil rights lawsuit, acted as a mentor to the leader of a new civil rights group in my area, and just completed a run for elective office. I've had friends bashed, been a bar bouncer and sorted out bashers (and general issue idiots), and spent more than my fair share of time in and around gay bars specifically and the LGBT community generally. I'm old enough and have been out long enough to remember, and miss even as I'm pleased with the lack of driving need, the gay ghettos of the past.
In short, this ain't my first rodeo, and I'm pretty darned sure that I can identify and, if necessary, deal with bigotry both up close and at a distance.
First off, tolerance is all we get to demand.
And it's one hell of an improvement, and we should be grateful to queens of Stonewall, the leather folks, and the drag community (and THEIR predecessors) for the huge progress we've seen as a community since WWII and specifically within the last twenty years.
We don't get to demand that folks like us (or hate us, which of course would be particularly silly). We get to demand that they damned well keep their paws to themselves, that they mind their own damned business (i.e., what consenting and competent adults do amongst themselves sexually is none of anybody elses business outside of an absolutely tiny number of circumstances), we get to demand equality before the law (including an end to DADT & DOMA [and the variously named offshoots thereof]). Peoples minds and feelings, so long as they conform with the above, are none of our business.
Secondly, Newbius, a careful sort, very cautiously refuses to attempt mind-reading as a hobby. He comments on directly observed behaviors in his personal experience rather than on second or third hand data. He acknowledges the limits of his data. Given the lack of verifiable data about the mental state of those he has observed (or that any of us observe) the very most he can with any certainty claim to have seen is "outward tolerance" short of public declarations of affection at one level or another (which many American and other subcultures do not encourage).
His experience is that Republicans of his personal acquaintance do not have an issue with LGBT folks. Dandy. Could be, just perhaps, that you and he are not dealing with the same Republicans. Could be they don't cut Republicans out with cookie-cutters such that they all fit the same mold. Might even be that the GOP is changing from what it was 10, 15, 20 years (or longer) ago...
Dandy. That he honestly relates his experience and observations thus far is reason to attack him?
Next off, as a libertarian lawfully gun-owning gay guy cursed with an activist streak I struggle to control...I've had occasion to play with a pretty wide array of conservative folks...and as a former pride co-chair and as a community member, perhaps an above average number of opportunities for personal growth and appreciation of diversity.
I've walked the walk, and tried when practical to bridge the gap, between both communities - at least partly because I believe they have an awful lot to offer each other.
And I've seen the saints and the bastards on both sides. And frankly, I've seen more tolerance - more willingness to stretch a mind or to tolerate a different viewpoint more often - amongst the gun-folks and the conservatives, particularly and especially in the under-40 crowed (though by no means exclusively) than I have run into on average among liberal/progressive crowd for those who dare to think or believe differently, or make choices outside of that particular philosophical norm.
And I can't count the number of times, on hearing of a gay bashing or a close call, that a conservative straight friend expresses a deep desire that the LGBT person had been armed....and reduced the number of bigots on planet precipitously. Or the number of gun-folks that I know that go out of their way, spending time and cash to teach firearms use and safety to folks generally, and to women and lgbt folks particularly. Not precisely an indication of "I hate
In neither case do I claim universality, nor do I claim to have engaged in extensive scientific studies. I merely relate my experience.
My experience is that, per capita, the ratio of bigots, elitists, and hypocrites per capita is far higher among the liberal/progressive crowd than among conservatives generally and the more libertarian-oriented specifically.
Your mileage may vary.
Libertarian=Member of the Libertarian Party or a grammatical issue. Usage should indicate which.
libertarian=shorthand for "someone that believes society is best served by folks, particularly governmental folks, minding their own damned business and leaving the unconsenting alone to the extent practical". Much easier to spell, and fewer keystrokes to boot.